Making a quick post before I leave for school at 12 to pick up some stuff from teachers & friends.

Alfred's telling me to get the Sony mp2 player. IT'S SO UGLY T_T.
But I can't be bothered shopping for one, and it seems most suited (battery life :D) so whatever. I'll get it in the city today then get another one when I get back to Taiwan. I need music again, or I'll die.

Rah, after going to the city, I have no idea. Don't know what I'll feel like doing. Oh well, I'm gone.
Bye-bye!

*****
Anger now overrides guilt. I think I'm just pushing the guilt to the side. Because I know I have to think this way, for myself to stay alive and for myself to keep promises. I have changed a hell of a fucking lot; I'm actually doing this.

You know why I held a face that was void of emotions the other day. I don't know if you could see I was struggling so much to keep it up.

Today, I stopped the tears in 10 seconds. It took me that long to push the sadness and guilt over a bit. I have to do it every 10 minutes or so. It's painful, I'm manipulating myself. Like what the fuck?

I don't know if this is for the better or worse.